I've cried way too much over all of this s*it.. I've just had enough.. I'm not able to hide my true self that well anymore.. The barriers around my heart are starting to break..
Thanks to my (often happening) break downs I could draw our bathroom floor to anyone if they'd want that.. I just fall down and everytime I break down I feel like hurting or killing myself.. And it just keeps happening more and more often..
Maybe one of these days I will break down for good and disappear from here once and for all..
At the moment the thought makes me feel a bit more comfortable.. Especially after destroying and losing so many friendships because of my depression.. After I'm gone everyone will be so much happier.. No one will ever hear of me and they don't have to even visit my grave.. And my parents and family?
They still have my little brother..